Overheard a waitress say her date ordered for her without asking, made me rethink my last date

She told the host it was the biggest red flag she ever saw and I realized I did the same thing to my date last month, has anyone else had someone order for them and feel totally dismissed?

3 comments

3 Comments

jones.anna1mo ago

Best to just ask first, saves everyone the awkwardness.

jones.anna1mo ago

Think about the last time someone got offended - was it actually about the asking, or did it go wrong somewhere else? Like, if I ask someone how their weekend was and they snap at me for being nosey, that's more about them being in a bad mood than me doing something wrong. Do you think people overthink the asking part when the real problem is usually something else entirely?

zarar6715d ago

Saw something online the other day about how most arguments actually start from assumptions, not the question itself. People fill in the blanks with their own fears and past experiences. If you ask something simple like "how was your weekend" and they snap, it's usually because they assumed you were prying or they are just having a rough day. The real issue is that people carry their own baggage into the conversation. So asking first does work because it puts the control back with the other person and leaves less room for them to assume the worst.